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You Can’t Hate Yourself Happy

We are so often our worst critics.  So many of us spend our days having an internal dialogue that is negative.  Whether it’s telling ourselves, we are too fat, useless, unable to do something, that we always fail so why bother.

Rarely does this approach make us happy or motivate us into action.

That voice is the voice of fear.  I like to call it the ‘mind monkeys’.  It wants to keep you stuck because familiarity is safe, however frustrating it can be.

Repetitive thoughts that we are not ‘good enough’ are harmful to our self esteem.   After all, your inner mind is always listening to that internal conversation.

If you keep telling yourself you can’t feel differently, achieve that thing, lose weight, be good enough – your inner mind will believe you.  This is not a great place to try and make changes from, as your unconscious beliefs will always win any battle with will-power. Some things to consider that can help are:

  • Become aware of any negative self talk.  Just begin to notice it and understand that it’s not necessarily the voice of truth or reason.
  • Is there any evidence for those unhelpful thoughts?  Question the wotsits out of them.
  • Realise that it just mind monkeys with the positive intention to avoid change in order to keep you safe.
  • Be nice to yourself.  Talk to yourself like you would a dear friend.  Encourage yourself, cheer yourself on.
  • Everyday look yourself in the eye in the mirror and say something positive and encouraging.
  • You may not be happy with where you are right now, but acceptance is the first stage of change.  Use your present situation as a springboard to improvement, to success.
  • Avoid negative people whenever possible as their negativity can rub off on us.  Spend time with people who lift you up, rather than drain you.  If it’s not possible all the time, use the techniques mentioned in my previous blog on dealing with other people’s stress.  You can find it HERE.
  • Accept and embrace the fact that you are unique, there is no one on this planet and never will be, exactly like you.
  • You are not perfect but that is okay! No one is!  You are though, perfectly imperfect.
  • Understand that you cannot fail – although you can learn how not do something, which means you are one step closer to achieving it.

If you feel like you are not able to take hold of this negativity about yourself, you may want to consider a hypnotherapy session to clear our the root cause for your low self-esteem and install confidence and self belief.

If you would like a no obligation, friendly 15 minute chat about this, please do be in touch with me.  jo@jojohypno.co.uk 

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